Confuddled

Not sure how to start this one. Many mixed feelings today ... time to start writing to try to sort this all out... My dear friend Jo just lost a grandson today ... poor wee JJ didn't have a chance .. he was born with downs syndrome and had many respiratory problems ... the wee fellow fought hard, but still couldn't make it to his first Christmas. Another angel to watch over us, just sent for a short time to teach us what love is? ... or did he have another purpose that we haven't discovered yet.
This all brings back so many sad memories and so very much pain. I can't get my head wrapped around it ... I can't figure out how I feel. I never got to meet JJ, but I love his Mum and his Grandma and any child is so very precious to me, the feelings are there but won't sort themselves out. I cry a bit for a lost baby, then, I wonder if he's really better off since he had so many health problems and not much chance to ever lead a full life ... but what is a 'full life' ... isn't any life to be treasured and the loss of it mourned.
So, rest in peace, sweet, innocent JJ. I'm sorry I never got to know you, but I will still mourn for you and trust you are happy and free from pain and sorrow now.....